Flipper & Mr. Ed

Let me tell you what some of those things were for me:

I’ve always wanted to swim with Dolphins. THEN I heard that you have to put a wet suit on (and let’s not forget the cameras that would be present).

I’ve always wanted to stay in a hotel with a swim up bar. Who am I kidding?  That required a bathing suit!

And right before my 50^th birthday, a friend and I were making plans to go to Cartagena, Colombia (insert Pablo Escobar/Narcos joke here…LOL) and OMG!!!!  You can ride horses on the beach!!!!!  Well… SOME people can ride horses on the beach…but only if they’re under 250 pounds.  That left me out.

It was seeming like every time I really wanted to do something, my weight was a huge issue for me.  Oh, who am I kidding?  Even when I didn’t want to do cool things, my weight had become a huge issue for me.  287.2 pounds, Type II Diabetes, foot and leg pain, knee pain, hip pain…and I should have owned stock in Rolaids!

(Anyone know what an excess of antacids can cause? Kidney stones—ask me how I know?)

I had so many reasons to pay closer attention to my health, but instead I chose to suffer daily.  And I do mean SUFFER.

Why?

Why was I choosing suffering?  Because it was the path of least resistance.  Changing anything about my lifestyle seemed too daunting a task.  Wayyyyy too much effort.  And let’s face it, I was exhausted.

Everyone has challenges, and I have certainly had my fair share.  I owned a farm – grass fed beef, pork, chicken, lamb & veal.  And I also had 2 food trucks that ran daily, as well as a catering and baking business.  Did I also mention that I had the Mother-in-Law from hell living with me?  An unapologetic alcoholic who left devastation in her wake – and I was her favorite target.

Now, I know what you’re thinking – thank god you have a husband.  Well… he was in Afghanistan and had been gone for 14 years (let that one sink in) He retired from the Army after 23 years and decided he wanted to go back.  So, he floated the idea of being gone for a year….and 14 years later, he was STILL gone.  He was a project manager for a company in Virginia and unfortunately, his project was in Kabul.

Now, he came home 2ce a year for 30 days at a time but let’s just say he was not the most helpful when he came home.  He did his best, but in the grand scheme of things, it was like putting an alien in an operating room.  And then imagine that alien is taking instruction and direction from his wife…. Yep, it went well…. But I digress.

The point I’m trying to make is that I was alone. And tired. But tired is an understatement.

How the hell was I going to make meaningful change and alter my course when I didn’t even have the energy to get up the stairs to bed? (seriously, I slept on the couch for 5 years!)  I was doing my best to just get through the day.  I was doing my best to handle everything life was throwing at me on a daily basis.  And for the record?  Life has a SPECTACULAR throwing arm!

Something. Anything. EVERYTHING needed to change.  But none of it was going to unless I started with my attitude.

Why do I not value myself?

Why do I not think I’m worth it?

If I don’t value myself, how can I expect anyone else to?

And so it began, I ordered my first box and had no idea what to expect.  One year in, I know exactly what to expect:

I expect swimming to get a cocktail WITHOUT getting out of the water.  And if Flipper is on the underwater barstool next to me… EVEN BETTER!

Don’t forget to share this post!